Its Your Birthday

Hi Lo!

Today is your 29th birthday!  Today is also the day where I enter the ICU as a real live doctor for the first time.  I don't really start until tomorrow ... but they are going to show me around today.  Can you believe it?

We all miss you very much.  I know you're with me all the time.  And just in case you were thinking about going on vacation for your birthday, don't.  You need to be in the ICU tomorrow to help me out. You've been there way more than any of us!

I sure hope you are having an absolutely amazing heavenly birthday party with lots of blue balloons and yellow cake with chocolate icing and homemade chili and drumsticks.  I know you are. 

Love you to the moon and back!

Orientation

Day one of orientation done.

Today made the first day of medical school look like child's play.  Its a good thing I have practice drinking from a firehouse.

I have a pager.  I have a badge that says I'm a doctor.

They say I'll work 12+ hour days 6 days a week for the next year.  I suppose my body will quickly realize that what the badge says is true.

Hopefully my pysche will catch up shortly thereafter.  It just doesn't seem real.

I'm a doctor.  

On Moments

As I sit here watching the Houston Firefighters Memorial, I can't help but feel for the families at this exact moment.  Leaving the funeral is the worst part.  The finality of it is overwhelming.

Walking out of Lo's funeral, I was completely overwhelmed by the enormous number of people who had loved Lo and who were surrounding us with their love.  Halfway down the aisle, I realized I was walking all alone, without my best friend, for the first time.  How strange that surrounded by all those people whom I loved that I could feel so alone for an instant.  I'm sure some of the family and friends of those firefighters are feeling that right now.

It was only an instant.  Ever since then, I've felt the love and presence of my sister constantly.  I've felt it through the actions and words of others.  I've felt it through the changes of the seasons.  I've felt it through the sound of thunder and rain and rainbows.  I've felt it through the presence of hummingbirds. I've felt it when I've called friends who lived 15 minutes away and somehow appeared at my front door 9 minutes later.

Saturday morning, I felt the absolute opposite of loneliness.  It was Lo's goddaughter's birthday party.  At the end of the party, Lauren asked for a balloon.  When her uncle asked why, she said she wanted to send it to Lo.  We went outside and watched the balloon rise straight up for what seemed like hours until finally it couldn't be spotted anymore.  It was amazing.

My prayer for the friends and families of these four is that they get to experience countless moments like that.  Moments where they know those gone before aren't really all that far away.  Moments where they know their best friends are still right beside them.  Moments where they get to see the love of those still around.  Moments where they get to appreciate the moments of life that were taken too soon from others.

On Thinking Time ...

Giving the mind, body, and soul a chance to rest is one of the most important things we can do.  I do not remember any of the other 6 habits from the bestseller The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens, which is the version of the book I read in high school.  #7, sharpen the saw, really stuck with me though.

It is so important to take the time to make sure I am taking care of myself.  Pushing exercise to the back burner and grabbing take out ... all in the name of accomplishing other goals ... is so easy.  Its not like I'm doing those things and then sitting on the couch and watching TV.

However, I decided to take some time to do nothing but relax and think.  I have not given myself a chance to sit around and think very much in the past year because I haven't really wanted to think about some of the things I need to think about.  Its easy to just push things to the back if you don't stop and think about them.

So I'm thinking.  Memorial Day morning I woke up and decided to go to Mount Rushmore.  Why not? I drove north and west and north some more and drove through tornadoes and plains and rolling hills and miles where I had no cell coverage and never saw another car.  That was some good thinking time. I've also now officially been to all 48 continental United States.

single buffalo, buffalo herd, Ollie, backside of Mt Rushmore, hiking around a beautiful lake, hidden staircase, somewhere in the Dakotas, my copilot, memories

After a day at home and a bachelorette party, I'm continuing the thinking time.  For the next few days, I'll be thinking from here.  And probably rereading the 7 habits so that I can find out what the other 6 are!  :)

Way Way Too Long

It has been entirely too long since I have written about anything of substance.  In fact, its been entirely too long since I've written about much of anything.  For the past two months I've more or less been on vacation from everything, including writing.  However, its time to start getting back into a routine!

In the past few months, I've matched into an internal medicine residency in Tulsa (a dream come true), graduated from medical school, been on some incredible adventures all across the country, moved into a new house, and spent a fair amount of time piddling.  Who knew piddling could keep you so darn busy?

So, rather than jumping in with something profound, I'm just jumping back into the writing world by putting something/anything out there.  Hopefully in the next few days I'll be back in the groove!

CFF New Leaders Speech

Here's my speech to the 500+ people who chose to come and support the CFF at Tulsa's New Leaders. It was a great night!  Enjoy!  :)

On the Golden Rule ...

The single most important axom amongst all religions is the Golden Rule.  From the days of ancient Greek philosophers to Babylon and the Code of Hammurabi to present day Christianity and Islam, the Golden Rule has remained a central tenet of morality.

Isocrates (Greek philosopher): Do not do to others what would anger you if done to you by others.

Christianity (Luke 6:31): And as you wish others would do to you, so do to them.

Confucianism: 己所不欲，勿施於人。(What you do not wish for yourself, do not wish for others.) 

Islam (Sunnah): No one of you is a believer until he desires for his brother what he desires for himself.

You get the idea, right?  So why is it that, as a general population of human beings, we have such a hard time embracing this incredibly simple virtue?  I wish I knew where I'd saved these pictures from earlier this week ... but I had pneumonia and took lots of medicines and can't give them the credit they deserve.  These pictures all got me thinking ... and I hope they get you thinking too.  The single biggest way we fail the Golden Rule is by lacking tolerance.  I'm not saying to be tolerant of murderous psychopaths ... I'm just saying be tolerant in general.  If someone disagrees with me, I need to respect his right to disagree as opposed to simply proclaiming him a worthless hellion.  I don't need to hate you because you hate me.  In fact, if you hate me for no reason, its even more reason for me to smile at you and be kind because I want to treat you how I want you to treat me.  Kill them with kindness.  If only I could actually kill people with kindness.  And if only I could take my own advice better.  :)

And then this morning, I read this really interesting article.  I don't agree with 100% of what it says ... but I do with most of it.  Take the time (2 minutes) to go and read it.

It is not my job to judge anyone ... someone else is going to take care of that on a much larger scale at a much later date.  It is not my job to spread hate in any form.  It is not my job to determine who is right and who is wrong when it comes to matters of personal belief.

It is my job to give everyone the respect I feel I deserve.  It is my job to politely and earnestly listen to viewpoints that differ from mine if I want people to politely and earnestly listen to me.  It is my job to spread compassion and tolerance.

As a population, it is our job to treat each other how we want to be treated.  If we all remember this this week and actually lived those words ... imagine what we could accomplish.  :)